I promise I do not abuse him!

Eli is smack dab in the middle of 2 year old turmoil. Some may call it the terrible two's, but I refuse to refer to it as that because that's a mindset I do not want to put myself in. The truth of the matter is, he's testing boundaries to the full extent he can, he's trying to be independent and "do it myself" and he's very easily bored. That's all it really comes down to.

In the midst of this inner conflict he's going thru (which lemme tell ya, is ROUGH on mama) he's developed a sense of 'my-way-or-else' and does some really bizarre things. He's been known to smash himself into the floor or run head-on into a wall. He's been seen throwing things at Jacob, head butting Michael and me and crying/whining LOTS. Before you get all "well, you should discipline him" with me, you should know that my days are consumed with disciplining him. We are slowly starting to see improvement in his obeying and in his general demeanor. He is of the personality type that you have to be EXTREMELY consistent in discipline and not slack in the least bit - not even once.

So, this morning it was no surprise to me when he told me "no" about something. When I then told him he was in trouble, he decided the best course of action when I took his hand was to start flailing around and trying to get away from me. In the process he managed to fling his head into my arm and bust his nose (fortunately, it was my arm and not the metal frame of the futon we were sitting near). He finally decided to calm down when he realized he'd hurt himself (and bloodied his nose). He did still get in trouble, though.

My constant prayer in guiding this child is that God would give me the wisdom to know how to deal with him in the most Godly/loving way possible, the peace to not completely lose it and the strength to endure this tough season. I firmly believe that God only lets us get into situations that we can handle with His guidance, but it's those days when I stubbornly don't lay my burdens at the cross where I feel out of control and like I can't make it another day. The Lord is my source of strength. Without Him I would be lost. I am far from the mother I know God desires me to be, but each day I am learning.